Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Wednesday Weekly Wrapup Brought to You By Right Lawns

As we draw deep into the summer months, I was wondering where my main provider of grass mowing has gone. I can't seem to get a hold of anyone associated with Right Lawns "We Get it Done Right" anywhere in the Louisville area. If anyone can help me out that would be much appreciated.  Now to this weeks weird, interesting and most important stories brought to you in satire. 

LEBRON WINS HIS FIRST OF SEVEN NBA RINGS: It has been exactly a week since several people paid over a million dollars to party with James and D-Wade after the Heat won the NBA Finals. Now I'd say the partying is over and Lebron must focus now on winning six more if he ever actually wants to impress anyone.

Jacksonville St Fans Fan are is Upset About Post-Season Ban: Both of Jacksonville State's basketball fans are obviously upset about the Gamecocks not being able to play in the OVC Tournament next year had they made it, but with football right around the corner I'm sure at least one of them no longer cares. 

Rakeem Buckles Leaves UofL For FIU: Some fans are now bashing Rick Pitino for letting another player go. First it was Jared Swopshire that Pitino had said last year, would not be offered a scholarship for next season. For this particular case I am going to side with Pitino. When a student has an academic scholarship taken away because their grades have plummeted, people don't feel sorry for them. They say things like "we'll you should have studied more." However, when an athlete hasn't gotten any better and in some cases, has taken steps backwards, the Athletic Department should be obligated to honor that scholarship. That's not right, I'm with Pitino on this one, if you have the opportunity to get better players and you need scholarships get rid of some. (However, that can't really help recruiting with the parents.)

College Football Goes to 4 Team Play Off: At last the debates are over! We no longer have a committee decide who is going to be playing for the NCAA Football National Championship because they're gonna play it out on the field! No more back and forth about who should get in and who shouldn't. Four teams will now battle it out and I am sure this is fail-proof. I mean the 5th and 6th best teams won't care because the committee said they weren't the 4th best and those teams and everyone else will just accept that. Thank goodness our college football post-season problems have finally been cured.

RIZZO MANIA: Anthony Rizzo has been called up to the Major Leagues and Chicago Cub fans have a lot to be excited about. Rizzo singled in his first at bat, then doubled later in the game. Now if he can just hit 4-6 Home runs a game and pitch 9 shutout innings the Cubs could have a chance to win out. Which would put them pretty close to second place in the Division.


  1. OMG You agree with Pitino on something???? Are you sick?

  2. HAHA Just this once, don't get used to it

  3. What the hell is right lawns?

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